Thursday, May 24, 2007

Freaking in

By Adam Gibson ©

i have freaked out then
freaked back in again.
i have come full circle with
some parts of me worse for wear,
ragged, run down or flapping in the air
but the important thing is
i have freaked out and come
freaking back in again

i call it full circle
i call it an awful cycle
i call it the bad years
i call it all sorts of things
including "when i was freaking out".

i am only ever two heartbeats away from a panic attack
but that’s fine with me because it’s better than one.

a million sirens across the valley flatblocks of bondi,
somebody dead in the bondi hotel or
hit by a car on campbell pde.

there is so much noise and it has framed
every day of my visit out to freak
and my tentative return from there.

i have freaked out and freaked thankfully back in again

and the soundtrack has been the
rev of the 380 bus outside my window
and the strains of tyres around the bends of the corner,
plus a thousand screamed drunks
skidding against their heads in conversation
leaving the rsl or golf club.

all those people moving and unknowingly
being part of my aweless journey,
my trickling limp towards freaking out and
my limping,
occasionally triumphant,
occasionally non-existent
return from that shadowed place.

i have freaked out but i have now
freaked back in again.


Anonymous said...

you forgot to mention the seagull on the lamp post - LLG

Anonymous said...

Love the bit about the 380